Returned

I'm settled in at home now. I'm not fully unpacked yet though. I've got The Golden Girls on and the cat is on my lap. I'm about to go have a bath. Tonight Titania and I are going to go out so I want my hair straightened. I bought a huge box of peaches so I need to put them in the fridge, at least the ones that I'm not giving to my neighbours.

When I was shopping the other day I bought thongs from old navy and they are super bloody comfortable. The fabric is soft and they totally fit well. The bra I bought that day too is also great. I'm considering wearing my smartballs out tonight. We'll see how I feel when I'm getting ready.

I started talking about something in my audiopost last night that I didn't really explain. I saw a friend I hadn't seen in about a year and it made me realize how few male friends I have here at this point in my life. Growing up a large majority of my friends were guys and in England it was pretty even but here my friends are almost all girls.

Anyway seeing him and being hugged kind of reminded me why I do want a boyfriend sometimes. I get hugged by my female friends a lot (ie. everytime we see each other) but having a guys arms around you, even if they will only ever be friends, is different. This also touches onto why even though I would totally have sex with a woman, I don't have a desire to be in a romantic relationship with one, or why I tend not to consider myself bi-sexual when most people ask (but that's a much more complicated thing).

Mostly it was just good to see that boy. He was someone who was around when I left and who I talked to while I was gone but who I hadn't seen yet. It was good in a way that's hard to explain; It was good to see him doing ok because his winter wasn't great and it was a connection to a part of the life I left last year and won't get back in the same way. And I had really good dessert at the restaurant we ate at.

But now my body wants me to end this and have a shower and wank. Not thinking about the boy though - he's forever off limits. I'm not quite sure what will be the subject of my thoughts yet.