Sudden

Maybe it was creeping up yesterday but this morning I have been hit with a deep sadness. Over what I'm not exactly sure. Money is likely. Or not being good at what I thought I was good at. I want to stay in my bed and cry today. Instead I must go to work. I know I have at least one client.

Piercing

So after a conversation with Zebra today I tried masturbating for the first time since getting the jewelry and fuck. I mean it was totally different. Like what I had to do and how it felt. So strange. I just don't even know what to say or think. But I had to get up out of bed and post. fuck. seriously.

What's New?

1. Size 12 jeans!!!!! So exciting. In December I was wearing 16's.
2. Black, open toed, patent wedges.
3. Silver purse with a bow.
4. Perfect black cropped cardigan.
5. A new friend via my housemate.
6. Super awesome dark blue hair.
7. a not-sore-at-all genital piercing. It makes me feel powerful.

What's not new? My inability to interact/flirt with guys. ugh. I must work on this. It makes me feel not pretty when I know I do look awesome. Oh, and posting while drunk. girly-juice martinis are good. That's not a metaphor for sex. I'm not allowed sex for 3-4 weeks.