Choices

Do I stay content and relaxed and live in denile, or do I panic and go crazy? I'm sure there's a middle ground somewhere, but considering I'm taking ativan out with me for the first time in months it's very far away.

I'm back to not understanding my life. I don't have the person I can go to in a crisis . Maybe I'm not meant to have this money. Or this life. I want my therapist back even if it has to cost me $165 and hour.