hopes

Tomorrow I am going to go to the location of my gym that is by my house. I've never been before but I'm not wanting to go downtown tomorrow. It's my day off and I'm going to behave like it is.

I know they have a steam room and I am really hoping it is not co-ed because I currently have no bathing suit. I want to be able to go inside it all sore and sweaty in just a towel and relax. Just close my eyes and dream about something.

Texting CRB gave the results I truthfully expected. Small messages ensuring we are still friends, but nothing to say he actually misses me or wants to see me. I know this is what I should have been expecting. I know if I got more, I would have realized that it wasn't what I wanted at all.

I'm keeping secrets. hamsters, work, money, love. I just don't know how to fix things. I'm clinging to what makes me happy. And trying to think about how to get rid of the secrets without actually revealing them.